Self Care: What Millennials Can Teach Moms

According to the internet (which means it must be true because Abraham Lincoln said it), I am actually a Millennial. Here’s me and my mom circa 1986. (I miss being a blond!) Another thing you can find a lot about on the internet (especially social media) is self care.

I was born in 1982, which is the first year of Millennials. Which I find to be cray cray..so much so that it made me drop my avocado toast. 

Anyways…

Millennials get a bad rap. They are painted as self-absorbed people who crave participation trophies. However, as always, there is some grain of truth to such stereotypes and I think there is something us moms can learn from Millennials. Let me explain.

Millennial behavior is reactionary

Yes, it is mom and dad’s fault!

We consider Millennials to be self-absorbed because the generation before them (their parents) are on the other side of the pendulum. Instead of “self care,” Millennials’ parents value “self sacrifice;” work hard to care for everyone but themselves while burning the candle at both ends. Millennials look at the parents who are exhausted, stressed, sick, running the rat race and decide that there needs to be a better way of “Adulting.” Just as the hippies of the 60’s rejected their parents’ values with sex, drugs and rock and roll, Millennials reject their parents’ lifestyle with yoga, avocado toast and beard oil.

Millennialism for the Weary Momma

Moms, we can make note of this self care. Even though the internet says I’m a Millennial, I definitely have the hard working-stress yourself-to-the-limit characteristics of the generation before me. What does that produce?

A weary mom.

As I write, I’m sitting in the Texas State Capitol in Austin. My kids are participating in a government workshop. We spent the night in the a hotel and I set a strict 8:30pm bedtime (partially because of our early wake up time, and partly because I was exhausted from preparing for the trip and driving the 4 hours to Austin).

I woke up at 5:30 am wide awake and so rested! How? Because I got 8 hours sleep for the first time in a decade!

Not. even. exaggerating.

I didn’t have a baby or a dog or my husband’s snoring waking me up every other hour! Sleep is something that I have sacrificed and it is taking a toll. It’s a major area where I need to practice self care.

Save the kid food for the kids

Nutrition is another area where it is really easy for us moms to neglect ourselves. We can start to eat “kid food” or if we’re tired from a lack of sleep or stressful schedule, we are more prone to grab fast food with empty calories, little nutrition and lots of fat! So we start to put on pounds, our skin and hair look dull, the chemicals in the fake food makes our hormones out of whack and we develop a poor self-image that affects those around us. Invest in some good vitamins and supplements, mom. Figure out if you have nutritional deficiencies and go from there. Being selective about what food you put in your body is self care.

Have a Heart to Heart with Your Husband

Your husband loves you. Just as it is your job to self care, it is his job to care for you. But sometimes we unfairly expect our husbands to be all-knowing. They are not. Sometimes we sacrifice ourselves so our hubby’s don’t have to worry about the financial burden of buying supplements, or a gym membership or organic produce. Don’t do that. We must communicate our needs to our husbands.

If we are not feeling healthy or happy about our bodies, we need to talk to our husbands about this. We need to ask him to help us figure out what we need to do to care for our bodies. Be specific about your problems and your suggestions for solutions. Listen to his input and make a plan together. His part may be adjusting the budget so you can support a healthier diet, taking you on more date nights, joining you in the gym or cheering you on to help you stick to a diet. He’s your partner and can be a great encourager and accountability partner, if you let him!

So moms, lets take a queue from the self-caring Millennials and not feel guilty about it because…

Self Care Benefits your Entire Family

Your self care is not only for you but also for your family. When you care for yourself, you are becoming a better wife and mom. When you practice self care, you are less stressed to deal with your kid when he breaks a window or gets in a fight with his sister. Self-care will make you healthier, so you have the energy to run around with those crazy kids. Your mind will be sharper to make smarter decisions.

[bctt tweet=”Practicing self-care is one of the most loving things you can do for your husband and children.” username=”broccoli4bfast”]

Lets Do It: Exercise for Self Care

Exercise. Ladies we need stretching, cardio and weight training. Be sure to get all three (See my post Focusing on Diet and Exercise Alone Sabotages your Health). Find something that is fun! 

Running for me is not so fun. On the other hand, sparring people in Tae Kwon Do is super fun! It makes me want to train EVERY DAY! That is the kind of exercise you want to find. Something that won’t feel like a chore doing it.

Of course, some things we have to do. You may not like lifting weights, but as we age, it is a necessity. Find ways to make the things you don’t want to do less painful. Plan it multiple times a day in short spurts, as opposed to a one hour block. Invite a friend or kid to workout with you to make it more enjoyable. Figure out a reward system that will encourage you. Hey it worked for you as a kid, it will work now! Plus, exercise is an awesome stress reliever and will make you feel good! Ultimate self care!

Give yourself an opportunity for 8 Hours of Sleep.

I know this is probably the hardest to do when practicing self care and we are still trying to figure it out in our home, but it is most important. Rest is essential to self care. There are some seasons in our lives where this may be near impossible (I’m looking at you newborns!). Also, there is much evidence that shows how improper amounts of sleep cause a myriad of heath issues from Alzheimer to cancer. See my post How Less Sleep Equals More Sickness: Get your 8 Hours of Sleep.

Eat a good diet (even if the rest of your family lives on beans and rice).
When living on a budget, food is one area where we try to shave off as much as possible. So we end up purchasing cheaper, not-so-healthy food for our family. After all, a box of Mac and cheese is the same price as an avocado, but can feed more people! Mom, if you need to increase your intake of healthy foods, it is worth the investment. If you need to consume foods on the Dirty Dozen list, get it organic. You are worth it.

REALLY clean your home. Get rid of toxins and chemicals in your home that are making your sick and disrupting your body systems. See Your Body is Absorbing your Home for Good or Bad

Remember, you are not just a body.  You are a soul, you have a spirit. Self care is worth the effort. As this post focuses on physically needs, don’t forget about your spiritual, emotional or mental needs as well. I tackle physical needs because that is probably the easiest to manage or write a checklist. But don’t neglect the rest of yourself! Take time to pray or meditate, increase your faith, find community and get rid of toxic relationships and emotional patterns. More on those areas to come!

Take care of yourself fellow mommas. Let me know what changes you’ve made and comment below!

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